Wednesday 3 November 2010

Still Here

Was away from Mon-Fri last week and got sick when we came home so the last 10 days or so have been a blur.
While we were away I was actually pretty good with my planned treats, and had two great runs, but getting sick when we came home really threw and spanner in the works. Friday I felt dreadful and am ashamed to say that this lead to a weekend of serious comfort eating (binging). I've learnt over the last 15 months that comfort eating doesn't actually make me feel better and most of the time I have it under control, but this information seemed to conveniently disappear as soon as I got sick. All that was in my head was "I want a nice cup of coffee and some biscuits (cookies), they'll make me feel better", they didn't, so I tried something else. By Sunday night I'd tried most of the old favourites and although the tastes were just as good as I remembered, none of them actually made me feel better....
So on Monday I forced myself to get back on plan and went to the gym for my usual two classes. I really struggled through them both with my breathing etc but made it by doing them lower impact. Yesterday I went for a gym workout but gave up after struggling to just do an incline walk on the treadmill and came home.
Today I got on the scale for the first time in several days, hoping I might see a number just a bit above where I was when we went away, having had a couple of good days to repair some damage. Imagine my surprise when I saw it was between 0.5-1.0 lower still! So that really cheered me up. My breathing is also a little better today so I went to step at lunchtime and survived although it was still a struggle. Tomorrow is a gym workout and I should be having another PT session on Friday but when I saw my PT yesterday he said he thought it might be a good idea to cancel this week and rearrange when I'm 100% so as not to waste it, which I think is probably a good thing. I had hoped I'd have recovered enough for it by then, but I still only feel about 50% today and can't see me improving so much in another 48hrs.
The main thing I'm focusing on right now is getting back to feeling 100% so I can ramp up my workouts again, and the thought that I'm now only 2lbs from my original goal weight of 145lbs and a healthy BMI of 24.9 after over 15 years! I know now that this isn't going to be my final goal (I think 135-137 may be) but 15 months ago I couldn't even imagine being 245 let alone 145 or lower....

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